Having A Sister Can Be Good For Your Emotional Health

Sisters can fend off ex-boyfriends, mean gossip — and also, apparently, depression.

Having a sister protects young teens "from feeling lonely, unloved, guilty, self-conscious and fearful," according to a study to be released Monday in the Journal of Family Psychology. Researchers from Brigham Young University studied 395 families from Seattle with two or more children. At least one child in each family was between ages 10-14.

The research, conducted in 2007 and 2008, found that affectionate siblings have positive influences on each other no matter their age, gender, or how many years they are apart.

Loving brothers and sisters promote behaviors such as kindness and generosity. They also protect against delinquency and depression, says Laura Padilla-Walker, assistant professor in BYU's School of Family Life.

According to the study, having a sister prevents depression more than having a brother. This may be because girls are better at talking about problems or are more likely to take on a caregiver role, Padilla-Walker says.

The study also found that siblings have twice as much influence than parents over performing good deeds — including volunteering, doing favors for others and being nice to people.

"Siblings matter even more than parents do in terms of promoting being kind to others and being generous," Padilla-Walker says.

However, siblings who fight can have the opposite effect. Brothers and sisters who exhibit hostility toward each other are more likely to portray aggressive behaviors in other relationships, says James Harper, BYU professor in the School of Family Life.

Parents should be doing everything they can to help their children get along, he says.

"I would try to eliminate hostile name-calling, yelling as much as I could in sibling relationships and get them to exhibit more cooperative behavior," he says.

But no matter how much a parent intervenes, siblings have a unique power over each other.

"Siblings are people that a child lives with every day and yet we haven't really seriously considered their influence," Harper says.

The researchers say they were surprised to find sibling influence was stronger in families with two parents than one.

Padilla-Walker says a child with a single parent may become a "parent figure" to a younger sibling, which changes the typical brother or sister role.

www.usatoday.com

Happy Birthday, Sister

Tomorrow, November 21, (I won't say what year) I was given the greatest gift of a lifetime!
At not quite 2 years old myself I can not recall my reactions at the time. But I do know that it was one of the greatest gifts I could have ever received in my lifetime.
That "gift" was my sister.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! I hope there are many more for us to share together.

And here's to all the past memories of adventures while we were kids and still wrapped
snuggly in the warm existance of a stable household. Here's to the memories of growing up still
each others best friend. We have stood side by side, shoulder to shoulder, hands clenched together through all of the happy times and even while facing deaths and the gloom life brings.

The days of home made icecream and cake and spaghetti dinners have long past. And through the years we have changed some of the traditions ourselves. But what does remain unchanged is that we have those many memories to share and we will be sisters of the closest kind forever.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, SISTER. AND MANY MANY MORE. WE ALL LOVE YOU.

A sister can be seen as someone who is both ourselves and very much not ourselves - a special kind of double.
-- Toni Morrison